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The Revenge Games Page 21
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Her heart gave a painful squeeze.
God, she could wake up to that sight every day. She could sacrifice her entire life to have more of these moments.
Seeing him lying next to her, made her yearn.
Made her dream.
And even made her hope.
She knew it was damn dangerous to hope. Or feel this alive.
She had never felt those things in her life. And she should have been frightened, if not terrified by those feelings. But she wasn’t. She wanted to welcome those feelings for a change.
She smiled back at him as she held his face.
“My turn to be on top,” she whispered, and kissed him like it was the most important thing to do.
She was determined to hold on to the feeling of being alive and hoping for happiness. However brief the feeling might be.
***
Much later that morning, it was a rare unusual Saturday where both of them didn’t have to work.
“I feel lazy today. Want to watch a movie at home?” he asked.
His head was propped up on his hand and he was watching her face with anticipation.
“I don’t really watch movies,” she replied.
He grinned, flashing his dimples. “That’s because you haven’t been exposed to the right kind of movies.”
She looked skeptical.
He sprang up from the bed. “You don’t believe me? I’ll prove it to you. Let’s get going.”
“Now?” she asked.
“Yes. Now,” he laughed. “You have exhausted me enough. My poor abused body needs both nourishment and then some entertainment.”
She smiled as she dragged herself from the bed. “I’d like to go out for a run before the…movie plan,” she said.
And then, she watched him uncertainly as a thought occurred to her,. “Would you…like to join me?” she asked him.
It was simple enough offer for any normal person, but it took a huge effort from her side to extend that invitation to him.
He smiled widely, easing her discomfort. “I thought you’d never ask. I would love to join you. I’ve seen you head out for jogging each day, and almost joined you before. But I thought you preferred running solo.”
“I do prefer running solo,” she confessed. “But I think I might enjoy your company more.”
At her statement, his hand captured her elbow, and pulled her close. His expression turned serious as he stared into her eyes. “I enjoy spending time with you too,” he said before kissing her softly on the lips.
After freshening up a little, they ran for an hour.
It felt nice listening to him chat as they ran along a familiar path.
And when they returned, they showered, and headed to the kitchen where he fixed them huge, fluffy vegetable omelets with toasted bread on the side.
Once they finished breakfast, they sat in front of the big screen in the media room.
“So what are we watching?” she asked in amusement as she watched his eager face.
“An old movie. One of my favorites,” he said cryptically, while navigating through the movies on his touchpad.
Finally he made the selection, and sat next to her on the reclining couch, with their feet propped up.
A few minutes into the movie, her eyebrows were raised perpetually.
“What in the world are we watching?” she asked.
He grinned. “Do you like it? He’s a legend!” he told her excitedly, pointing at the actor on the screen. “I’ve been addicted to his movies ever since I was a little boy. Each time, a movie of his released, I always made sure I watched it on the very first day, if not the first show.”
She stared at Ajay for a few seconds, and was stunned that he wasn’t joking. The actor in the movie was performing ridiculous stunts, mouthing cheesy and overdramatic dialogues, but Ajay was enjoying each and every second of it.
“It’s ridiculous. And why does he talk funny like that?” she asked. The ‘hero’ of the movie had a strange diction along with strange body language and mannerisms.
Ajay looked outraged. “Shhh…what are you saying, woman! My daughter will hear you and think your comments about the legendary star are true! And by the way, his diction is not funny. It’s one of the best dialogue deliveries of all times. I’ve probably watched that particular scene, at least a hundred times. Still gets to me each time,” he said, and then repeated the dialogue along with the actor in the movie.
She was quite amused. And then, she got reminded of what he’d said earlier.
“You think our baby can hear us?” she asked.
“Oh yes. We really need to ensure that you are exposed to best of the movies or music from now on.”
“And you think, this movie is the best?” she asked, laughing in amusement.
He grinned. “Absolutely. No baby Einstein or Beethoven for my child. Only my kind of movies.”
She shook her head with a slight eye roll. Even though she discovered the fact about him being a huge fan boy of an aging South Indian star, quite endearing.
They spent the entire day, watching movies, cooking together, making love, and simply talking. It was the best day ever.
It was late in the night, but she felt relaxed and content.
She was lying on top of him on his bed, with her arms over his well-defined pecs. He was propped on his back against the headboard, and he was playing with a lock of her hair.
“Will you sleep here with me again tonight?” he asked.
At his words, she tensed up slightly, feeling torn.
He started to say something, but stopped. She knew he didn’t want to coerce her.
“Alright. I will,” she said, powerless against the pull of living a fantasy for some more time.
It felt real and normal. Cuddling and sleeping next to the man you had a relationship with.
It felt nice as he made them comfortable and then held her close again.
Soon, she heard his breathing deepen.
CHAPTER THIRTY ONE
IT WAS A Monday morning. Sia walked towards the kitchen, already showered and dressed.
She was starving. Last evening, she and Ajay had gotten too carried away. It all started when she tried distracting him while he made her watch another ridiculous movie. She had slid on his lap and kissed him hard.
That had gotten him worked up, and soon it led to other things that made them eventually skip their dinner.
It was truly one of her best weekends ever.
Ajay was already in the kitchen. And when he saw her, he gave her melting smile. He said goodbye to whomever he was talking to on the phone and ended the call.
“Good morning,” he greeted her with a kiss.
“Hungry?” he asked.
“Famished.”
“Of course you would be. You’ve been a very naughty girl yesterday,” he mockingly chided. “Here. Your breakfast is ready,” he said, fixing her an egg and vegetable sandwich.
She was about to reach for her plate, but she swayed when she suddenly felt dizzy.
“Sia!” he exclaimed and held her when she was about to fall down.
She sat down on a chair with his help, and rested her head against the back of the chair.
“Are you okay?” he asked in a worried tone.
“Yes. Just give me a minute.”
“You don’t look okay. You have shadows under your eyes and you look extremely tired,” he said, sounding guilty.
“I’m fine. I just need a hearty breakfast,” she murmured.
“No. I think we should call your doctor along with you taking a day off to rest.”
“I said I’m fine,” she replied testily, and started to eat the sandwich.
He didn’t respond and cut her a few slices of fresh fruit as an accompaniment.
Once she was done eating, she got up, and then swayed again. He rushed to her side and picked her up, and then placed her on a sofa in the living room.
“That’s it. I’m calling Dr. Batra, and we are going tog
ether to get you checked out,” he said firmly.
“I’ve already told you, I’m fine. Why are you hounding me this early in the morning,” she snapped at him.
“You are swaying. How can you insist you are fine?” he demanded.
“I said nothing is wrong with me. I just haven’t slept in 48 hours, okay? Tonight I’ll sleep in my own bed, and I’ll be fine by tomorrow morning.”
There was silence. And she realized what she had just said.
“You haven’t slept in 48 hours?” he asked her quietly.
She didn’t reply.
“Why, Sia? And why didn’t you say something about it to me?” he demanded, as both annoyance and concern crept into his voice.
“Because I liked sleeping next to you,” she mumbled irritably.
His face softened when he heard her say that.
“Okay. Why don’t you take rest for today…and then, tonight let’s sleep together in your bed,” he proposed.
“I c-can’t—”she broke off, unable to explain as she caught his keen gaze. “I-I need to catch a good night’s sleep to be able to function well. I can’t do it with you next to me. I can’t relax or sleep next to another person,” she confessed.
“You slept well enough on Friday night after we went out on a date,” he reminded her quietly.
“I-I…” she trailed off feeling helpless.
“What’s going on Sia? Lay it on me. I can take it. I know that you don’t want to get too close to me,” he stated.
“No. No. It’s not you. It’s me.”
He scoffed. “Riiight.”
“No. I’m serious. It’s all me. I’m a very restless sleeper,” she insisted.
When he didn’t reply, and held a slightly resigned expression on his face—as though he had tried his best, and she didn’t like his best effort—she crumbled.
“I have sleep disorders,” she confessed quietly.
He looked surprised.
“What happens when you sleep?” he asked.
She took a deep breath. “I don’t know,” she said, feeling frustrated. “It’s different each time. During my teens, I’ve been through several sleep studies. All that the doctors could do was to advice me to take some sleep aid medications. The pills worked. A little bit too much. To the point that I got extremely addic—” she broke off.
Then clearing her throat, she said, “To the point that I was unable to sleep without them. I stopped taking the pills from past three years. I don’t want to anymore. Especially now, since I’m pregnant.”
He watched her steadily.
“I think I can handle you being restless next to me as you sleep. Will you give me a chance to—”
“No Ajay, you don’t understand. It’s not just me being restless while sleeping. I-I have nightmares.”
Oh great, now she was spilling her guts out. Maybe it was the lack of sleep, or the hurt she saw in his eyes, when she told him they couldn’t spend their nights together. But she wanted to explain it to him.
He’d probably run away after she told him a bit about her. But she wanted to be brave at least once in her life, and take a chance. She didn’t want to keep hiding too many things from him.
“Your nightmares keep you awake at night?” he asked her quietly.
She nodded. “I’m frightened to sleep because of them. But I’m also…more scared to stay awake during the night.”
God, she was almost twenty five, and she was ashamed to admit that she was scared of an unknown boogeyman. Although her boogeyman now had a face.
Ajay didn’t laugh or say anything condescending like she had expected most adults to react to her fears. He held her hands.
“Can you trust me? Just for a few days. We can see if you are able to relax around me. Not today when you really need the rest. But later tonight, perhaps?” he asked.
She felt torn, but nodded jerkily. She stared at their joined hands in fascination as she felt her throat tighten.
“Hey, talk to me. Don’t shut me off,” he said softly.
She closed her eyes briefly to get rid of the sting. When she opened, she looked resigned.
“You must think I’m weird,” she whispered, unable to hide her despair.
He shook his head, and held her face in his hands, until she looked at him.
“No. I’m just frustrated that I cannot take away all your problems and whatever is bothering you. I’m not used to feeling powerless, especially when I want to help someone I really care about.”
She bit her lip uncertainly as she made a decision.
“I’ll take the day off today to catch up on sleep this morning. L-later in the night, we’ll sleep together in my room.”
“Thank you” he said, and kissed her on her forehead.
After laying a blanket on her, and turning off the lights, he left for work.
***
Sia woke up from a long nap, feeling refreshed.
She had slept for seven hours straight. As soon as she woke up, she began straightening her already neat room, and then made several calls to work. After she ate a late lunch, she called Varun.
“Still nothing, Sia,” Varun said in a frustrated tone. “I’ve watched hours of useless videos. We really need to ask that kid to get into the other cameras soon. Especially that guesthouse he keeps visiting. I’m quite sure we’d find something significant in those feeds.”
Varun was successfully able to place a tracker in that bastard’s car. So now, they knew most of the places he visited. But they were still quite frustrated with the MafiaBoy, who wasn’t moving quickly enough with the hacking of all the security camera feeds.
The last time, she had warned him sternly about not sending him more money if he didn’t move quickly with the hacking.
“You know, maybe you can convince that husband of yours to help us with this,” Varun said in a slightly sneering tone.”He’s been quite receptive to you so far. I’m sure apart from being a useless eye candy in your house; he can provide us with his technical skills to break into the security feeds.”
Varun always used that tone when he referred to Ajay. She knew Varun was quite wary of Ajay. Especially Ajay’s role in her life and their mission.
She had only let Varun know the bare minimum of her actual relationship with Ajay. She just told him that she and Ajay lived in a cordial manner at her home. She didn’t tell him about their intimacy or the fact that they were spending a lot of time with each other.
Varun would definitely flip out if he knew.
“No, Varun,” she said in a tone that brooked no arguments. “Keep Ajay out of this. I don’t want him involved until much later after my child is born. And even then, I’d prefer to keep him away from the ugliness that would come out after the exposure.”
“You can’t keep shielding that pretty boy from the ugly truth, Sia. He—”
“I can. And I will. I don’t want him dragged into this, more than what he is already. If he is caught tampering with the security cameras, and we don’t have enough proof of any child abuse by then, he’d be sent to prison for illegally hacking into a private footage. I’m not going to risk anything happening to him. Consider him off-limits,” she told firmly.
There was silence.
She knew she was thinking emotionally rather than practically. But she was not going to compromise when it came to Ajay’s safety. He was the only bright and vivid spark in her otherwise dark life, and she wanted to protect that with everything she had. She wanted to keep both those worlds apart.
“Fine. We’ll wait until the hacker gets back to us then,” said Varun.
***
Later that evening, when it was time for Ajay to get back from work, Sia felt a combination of both anxiousness and excitement for the upcoming night.
And when Ajay arrived, they sat down to have a relatively quiet dinner, after which they watched TV, until it was time for them to go to bed.
Ajay led them towards her room and entered inside, while she stood uncertainly n
ext to her bedroom door.
“Are you coming?” he asked, lying on top of her bed.
“I-I…have a ritual before I lock the door and sleep,” she said quietly.
Her heart began to thud as she revealed another piece of her. Something that would probably make even the staunchest of men, question her sanity.
“What ritual?” he asked casually even though his eyes were watching her steadily.
She hesitated a few seconds, before saying, “I always check to see if someone snuck into my room without my knowledge.”
He got up quietly from the bed, and checked all the possible hiding spots—which weren’t many, considering she had designed the room in that way.
“All clear,” he said quietly.
She bit her lip uncertainly and stood waiting.
“Why don’t you finish checking too?” he suggested, sliding into the bed.
She nodded her head jerkily in relief, and then proceeded to do her usual checks. And once she was satisfied, she slid into the bed next to him and turned off the lights.
As he held her gently, and spooned her from behind, she felt hope.
A few nights ago, she had slept beside him without a problem.
Maybe it was because she trusted him, and she knew he would protect her if anything bad happened to her.
Maybe he had healed her somehow.
And maybe, he was to be her guiding light helping her through the darkness of her nightmares.
Or maybe…she was simply being delusional.
Because as soon as she closed her eyes to slip into a deep sleep, all the security or trust in the world, couldn’t save her from her demons.
She had her nightmare.
Someone crept into the little girl’s room and stroked her cheek, waking her up.
She smiled sleepily. “Are you here to read me another story?” she asked, since he did that sometimes.
“No, Little Princess. I was missing you.”
She smiled innocently at him with a gap toothed smile. A few days ago, she had boasted to him about how she was getting grown-up teeth like him.
“Don’t ever grow up Princess. I love you the way you are now,” he had said at that time.